Beautiful Pains

It’s been a little over seven months since I married the love of my life. So far I have vomited profusely, cried sporadically, gained thirty pounds and countless stretchmarks. Yayy. In case you haven’t guessed it – I’m pregnant.

Let me just start by saying how this time has elapsed nothing like I thought it would, I had every intention of being a blend of Martha Stewart, Claire Huxtable and a stripper. Unfortunately, nausea and fatigue made it very difficult do be the non-stop cooking, cleaning, sex vixen of perfection I wanted to be for my husband. Instead, I had these symptoms that under any other circumstance would indicate I am dying but in pregnancy they’re described as normal and I couldn’t see anything other than all that I was now incapable of doing the way I once did. As usual, Holy Spirit slips a lesson into this season of my life and as usual; I am going to share it with you beautiful people.

Here’s how it happened:

I was in bed one day, lamenting over the pelvic pain and swollen feet I had now become accustomed to. I was scrolling aimlessly through old photos and looked at one of my 9 year old daughter, I began to think back on all that I was facing during my first pregnancy with her. Truth be told, it was a terrible time but when she came – none of it even mattered at all.

There was never a day I resented my daughter because of what I experienced during the process of having her. It was painful, but the outcome was breathtaking. Looking at her gorgeous little face brings me nothing but joy. The pain of the process never supersedes the beauty of the promise. In that moment it hit me, that I wasn’t just aching, I was creating! My body itself is being used to produce a new living person the world has never seen and doesn’t know it needs yet. I am pregnant with a promise that when all I see are symptoms, God sees the outcome! Enduring these beautiful pains, allows the earth to roar with new possibilities and endless creativity.

You may not be physically pregnant like I am, but we all possess something unseen that the world doesn’t know it needs yet. What if Einstein stopped because of the pain of failure? What if Martin Luther King Jr. stopped because it was dangerous? What if Oprah stopped because she was rejected? What if Yeshuah stopped because 39 lashes hurt too much?

You will never know how much the world needs whats in you until you endure those beautiful pains and PUSH!!!!

Until next time,

Live a little, love a lot, be a blessing!

 

 

If you liked this post, you’ll love my book 100 Days of Singleness !!!

Advertisements

To the other women…

I’m so sorry that I blamed you for the men that cheated.

I’m sorry that I called out your promiscuity rather than my own fear and insecurity.

I’m sorry that I was just another source of pain for you, that I allowed my own hurt to cut you with my words.

I’m sorry that I called you a whore, a slut and any other derogatory term just because I needed someone else to hurt as badly as I did.

I’m sorry that I didn’t acknowledge you were hurting too.

I’m sorry that instead of realizing our similarity, the fact that we both responded to a broken heart wrongly… I called out our differences in an attempt to make myself feel superior.

It didn’t work.

Can I be honest? I’m sorry that at some point,I became you!

Please forgive me for not being brave enough to leave. Forgive me for blaming you for my insecurities. I looked at you and you were just a reminder of what I thought to be my truth… I’m not enough, I never will be.

But can I tell you something?

You are beautiful! You don’t have to settle because of what you wrongly believe about yourself; allow your creator to show you who you really are! Don’t cheapen yourself to be more appealing to those who mean you no good. Don’t devalue what God has deemed priceless! You are worth God’s only begotten son! You’re the only one that doesn’t know your worth!

I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.
– Psalm 139:14

Step into your truth, I don’t pity you nor do I envy you. I love you, I want you to be healed as my God is healing me; I want you to be set free! I want the last time to be the last time you settle for sloppy seconds, stolen moments and cold shoulders.
God is waiting on your hurt so He can heal you. He’s waiting on you to face the truth; His truth of who you are!

Psalm 147:3 He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.